“My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the Lord. “And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine. For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.”
‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭55‬:‭8‬-‭9‬ ‭NLT‬‬

If you asked special needs families what is the hardest part of raising special needs children, you would get many answers. We often feel overwhelmed and question where we will find the strength, patience, and wisdom to help the ones we love most make it through life. Often times we are plagued by comparison. Our children don’t behave like other children do. They don’t excel in social settings or have developmental delays that cause overstimulation and prolonged melt downs. Dealing with the perceived judgment from people about our parenting can be discouraging, but do you want to know what is one of the hardest truths to swallow after a confirmed diagnosis? Grieving the life you thought you were going to have. Reaching a point of understanding that the hopes and dreams you had for your child are going to look a lot different than originally planned. We have to let the version of the story we would have written die and take on a different path. A path that is dimly illuminated and filled with unknown. Even Jesus’ disciples had questions when it came to disabilities. We read in John 9, “As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?” “Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him.” (John‬ ‭9‬:‭1‬-‭3‬ ‭NIV)‬‬ God wants you to know that this is not your fault. He isn’t punishing you or your child. This is what it means to believe God’s ways are HIGHER. We wouldn’t have written the story this way, but God wants to show us his glory, his power, his love, his might, and full sufficiency in every circumstance through his son Jesus Christ. Special needs parenting is an invitation to know God in ways we wouldn’t have otherwise.

I know we often feel like we have a complete lack of control over the circumstances set before us, but can I challenge you, and say that we are NEVER in control over our circumstances anyway?

Even when we feel we are in control it’s purely an illusion. Only God has complete and total control over everything that happens on the earth, and in our lives. I dare you to consider shifting your perspective and choose to be grateful to God for the reminder that while we are not in control, we have a relationship with the God that is in control. He is a good God, and a good father who can be trusted. We don’t have to carry the weight of a diagnosis on her shoulders, it’s too heavy for us, but it’s not too heavy for our Jesus. He carried our burdens when he carried the cross on Calvary Road. With his last breath he declared victory over everything saying, “It is finished.” So yes, even in the midst of complicated insurance policies, wait lists, IEP meetings, unanswered questions, and beyond, we stand on the words of our Savior and declare our victory over it all. Say it with me, with conviction: IT. IS. FINISHED. While it may be with weary and heavy hearts, our lifted hands and bended knees represent our complete surrender to the 4th man in fiery furnace. He is not a God that watches from afar, but he draws near to those who are broken-hearted. Jesus tells us, “This is what I died for.”

I want to leave you with one last encouragement and hold this one dear to your heart. Memorize it if at all possible.

“For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever! So, we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever.” 2 Corinthians‬ ‭4‬:‭17‬-‭18‬ ‭NLT‬‬